10/25. Chapter:
Jami at-Tirmidhi 1005 — Permitted Tears and Forbidden Wailing
What Has Been Related About The Permission For Crying Over The Deceased
Hadith About Crying Without Wailing
Jami at-Tirmidhi : 1005
Jami at-TirmidhiHadith Number 1005
حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ خَشْرَمٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا عِيسَى بْنُ يُونُسَ، عَنِ ابْنِ أَبِي لَيْلَى، عَنْ عَطَاءٍ، عَنْ جَابِرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، قَالَ أَخَذَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم بِيَدِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ عَوْفٍ فَانْطَلَقَ بِهِ إِلَى ابْنِهِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ فَوَجَدَهُ يَجُودُ بِنَفْسِهِ فَأَخَذَهُ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَوَضَعَهُ فِي حِجْرِهِ فَبَكَى فَقَالَ لَهُ عَبْدُ الرَّحْمَنِ أَتَبْكِي أَوَلَمْ تَكُنْ نَهَيْتَ عَنِ الْبُكَاءِ قَالَ " لاَ وَلَكِنْ نَهَيْتُ عَنْ صَوْتَيْنِ أَحْمَقَيْنِ فَاجِرَيْنِ صَوْتٍ عِنْدَ مُصِيبَةٍ خَمْشِ وُجُوهٍ وَشَقِّ جُيُوبٍ وَرَنَّةِ شَيْطَانٍ " . وَفِي الْحَدِيثِ كَلاَمٌ أَكْثَرُ مِنْ هَذَا . قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ .
Jabir bin `Abdullah Narrated from:
The Prophet Took Abdur-Rahman Bin Awf By The Hand And Went With Him To His Son Ibrahim. He Found Him In His Last Breaths, So He Took Him And Put Him On His Lap And Cried. Abdur-Rahman Said To Him: 'You Cry? Didn'T You Prohibit (Your Followers) From Crying?' He Said: 'No. But I Prohibited Two Foolish Immoral Voices: A Voice During A Calamity While Clawing At One'S Face And Tearing One'S Clothes, And Shaitan'S Scream.'" And There Is More That Is Stated In The Hadith.
Reference : Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1005In-book reference : Book 10, Hadith 41English translation : Vol. 2, Book 5, Hadith 1005
Summary of Jami at-Tirmidhi Hadith 1005
This hadith about crying without wailing gives a clear balance in grief. The Prophet held his son Ibrahim during his last breaths and cried. When Abdur-Rahman bin Awf asked if he cried despite forbidding crying, the Prophet said he had not forbidden normal tears. Instead, he forbade two foolish and immoral voices: a voice at calamity with clawing the face, tearing clothes, and Shaitan’s scream. The message is very practical. Islam does not ask people to be emotionless. Sadness and tears are human. What is forbidden in this text is uncontrolled mourning that includes harmful actions, loud sinful sounds, and behavior that crosses the limit of patience.
What we learn from this hadith
- Natural crying during grief is not the same as forbidden wailing.
- Clawing the face and tearing clothes are blameworthy mourning actions.
- The Prophet showed mercy and emotion while staying within limits.
- A calamity should not lead to Shaitan-like screaming.
